one way to live

A linger,

The feeling of smoldering lava, caught up between the chest and throat. A tension of the wrist as i lay down my pen and stare at the paper before me. Long have i sought to express all that is within, always taken back by the mellow conversations in my head. "There is wisdom in the tummy", screamed the shaman, but i notice the world turning it's back, starving him and earth's mystical nutrients of sustenance.

There is something wrong here, this dream. This dream is confusing and stifling. Melancholic is the mood as i see all the faceless eyes of today. No helm but a ditch. A sad abyss of failed dreams and the deluge of conscripted slaves streaming out from under the school yard and class halls. So many own mirrors but do not see past the sexist nature of primal needs. No view to the inner desires just the plain exterior they try to mask and keep secret. All seeking shudders with another throughout the cold black nights.

I see journeyman lost. I watch them stray far from their sacred paths into suits and ties. The pursuit for madness in oppressed cubicles. Too many walls in this one big open space. How are you? They ask - seeking not for a truth but a sentiment of false trepidation. Stand next, shoulder to shoulder, backs to backs, millions of us. This is how we hug...

The inverted smile; even that is missing. This place, where anger is wrong, yet polite hypocritical smiles attracts praise far and wide. Keep your eye on your numbers on a screen whom only you can touch... they might take it away. The thought of death, which once was a thing of beauty, lives now in burned ashes and retirement homes. What do we do with the beings whom can teach the ancient wisdom's. Nothing, a discard for convenience and maybe, kept as obligated guilt. So few i have witness, lives with deep reverence for the aged mystics, the gate keepers for our release of this dream state.

What do we hold as sacred anymore, truly sacred? I am ashamed of my decisions and time i have spent. Another day beckons, but i know no different will be the outcome, as it is so... Hope lives in the eyes of the blind, and i see this darken room, as my eyes have adjusted to the malcontent and misery. And i see, for the second time i see....

says god...